Congratulations, dumbass, you’ve waited until five days before Christmas and still don’t have her present. Nice going. And if she celebrates Hanukkah? Well, then you’re really in bad shape.

But all judgment aside, if you haven’t wrapped her gift yet because you just flat out have no idea what to get her, then fear not – Miss Wingman is here to help. In an effort to keep you from being “that guy” who sprints to the mall the day before you swap gifts and pleads with the salesgirl to help you pick out anything – literally, anything – I’ve curated a few options for you. These fail-safe girl gifts are thoughtful, generally wallet-friendly and pretty much what you’d call a “sure thing.” You know, like that cocktail waitress you used to…never mind.

First up? For the techie, tune-loving girl…

This printed, portable speaker from C Wonder is perfect for the girl who wants to take the party along with her (or the soundtrack at least). At only $24 and available in a variety of colors/patterns, you can’t go wrong with the gift of gadgetry and music. Or, for the messaging-obsessed female…

These texting mittens, made by the folks at Twitten, are ideal for staying connected while still keeping warm. The thumbs and finger flaps fold back for easy typing access. The upside? They come in an array of fun designs, as well as in gloves, if mittens aren’t her thing. The downside? Now you’ll never get her to put her phone down.

Next up, for the girl who loves to spruce up her abode…

Jonathan Adler’s fig scented pop candle is, in a word, divine. Not too girly (hey, you have to like it, too) but still fresh and pleasant, nothing cozies up her place like candles. Or, perhaps, pillows…

Because you can’t always be next to her, but she still needs something to cuddle with, these “love” and “lust” needlepoint pillows are a playful addition to her boudoir. Though cost is on the steeper side ($165 each), Adler also makes a million other prints and novelty pillows in a variety of shapes, sizes and price points.

If bling is more her thing, try these pyramid stud earrings by Wendy Nichol. They’re dainty but still edgy, and can easily become her everyday accessory. Available in silver, blackened silver, 14K yellow and rose gold…but I’d go rose all the way.

For the adventurous, active girl, try buying her an experience rather than a thing. If she’s into heights and isn’t afraid to soar, try trapeze school sessions or an indoor rock climbing package. If you do a little digging, I bet there’s one in your area. For all you NYC’ers: urban playgrounds like Brooklyn Boulders and Trapeze School New York offer tons of solid options.

Or if she’s on the sportier side, a Chelsea Piers gift certificate offers everything from golf lessons, batting cages, adult parkour (yes, I’m serious) and even sailing instruction. Hell, there are even places that offer glass blowing classes, if she’s crafty like that (Beastie Boys pun not intended).

From hot air balloon rides, to helicopter tours, to language lessons, gourmet cooking and even wine classes, there’s an experience out there perfectly suited for every female. You just have to think outside the box. But beware of the gift of concert tickets, boys. Unless she seriously likes to rock (as some of us do), it might send the message that the only time you put into her gift was the five minutes it took you to buy them on Stub Hub. At least the other ideas took some thought (albeit on my part). But my lips are sealed.

And finally, if she’s more of an indoors girl, give her the gift of bliss instead. Not that kind of bliss – minds out of the gutter, please – the pampering kind. Bliss Spa offers the “Happier Holiday Package,” which includes a facial, pedicure and 75-minute massage for $268 (a bargain, by Bliss standards). Or feel free to find an equally serene (and less costly) option in your area. After all, beauty indulgences are never a bad idea.

And there you have it – the gift-giving gospel for all you last minute gentlemen out there. It might still require some tailoring to her specific tastes, but this is a solid jumping off point to start. Choose wisely, choose quickly, and remember – choose expedited shipping.ETIQUETTE WINGMAN

But just in case you’re still stumped, you can always call for reinforcements. Miss Wingman is available for your holiday shopping needs. For additional guidance or to schedule a consultation, email yours truly at for more details. Cheers –MW.

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